What is Therapy? (an answer for kids)

I wanted to share with you a great little online resource ... KidsHealth (http://www.kidshealth.com/).  This site has three main sections, a "For Parents" section, a "For Kids" section, and a "For Teens".  In the "For Kids" section you will find a variety of topics (some include Feelings, Staying Healthy, Illnesses & Injuries, How the Body Works, Growing Body & Mind, Kids Talk, Cooking & Recipes People Places & Things, That Help, Staying Safe, Movies & Games, Health Problems, Grown-Ups, etc.)  Below is an article from KidsHealth on the subject of seeing a Psychologist, Psychiatrist, or Therapist.  Its a good little intro for typically developing kids who may soon be visiting a therapist.  It helps to clear up some misconceptions and ease the mind a bit.  It's also written in kid friendly lingo.

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If you have a broken arm or a bad cold, you go to the doctor for help and to feel better, right? Well, sometimes kids and adults have problems that can't be seen as easily as a broken bone or a runny nose.
When people have troubles with their emotions, their feelings, or the way they act, sometimes they see a psychologist (say: suh-kah-loh-jist), psychiatrist (say: suh-kye-uh-trist), or therapist. These are people who have gone to school for special training in the way people think and feel and know how to help people feel better.
The ones that see kids know a lot about kid stuff, like how kids think, how they grow up, and how they see the world. They are all experts who specialize in helping kids solve problems and deal with tough situations. They do their work mainly by talking with kids and helping them figure out what is causing the problems at school or at home. A therapist can help kids figure stuff out so they can feel better.

Why Would a Kid Get This Kind of Help?•What Happens There?•Getting Help Is No Big DealIf you have a broken arm or a bad cold, you go to the doctor for help and to feel better, right? Well, sometimes kids andadults have problems that can't be seen as easily as a broken bone or a runny nose.

When people have troubles with their emotions, their feelings, or the way they act, sometimes they see a psychologist (say: suh-kah-loh-jist), psychiatrist (say: suh-kye-uh-trist), or therapist. These are people who have gone to school for special training in the way people think and feel and know how to help people feel better.

The ones that see kids know a lot about kid stuff, like how kids think, how they grow up, and how they see the world. They are all experts who specialize in helping kids solve problems and deal with tough situations. They do their work mainly by talking with kids and helping them figure out what is causing the problems at school or at home. A therapist can help kids figure stuff out so they can feel better.

Why Would a Kid Get This Kind of Help?There are many reasons to see a therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist, but the biggest reason is so that you can start feeling better. Maybe you're having trouble getting along with your classmates, your brothers or sisters, or your mom or dad. Or maybe you're having problems learning or paying attention in class, or your homework and your grades aren't as good as your mom or dad think they could be.

Other reasons to go see a therapist could be that you're very shy and have trouble making friends or that you feel sad, afraid, or anxious a lot. If your parents get divorced, or if someone who is close to you dies, seeing a therapist is a great way to talk about your feelings.

Sometimes kids can be the victims of abuse, and some kids your age can even have problems eating. These are all types of problems that can often get better if you get care from a psychologist, therapist, or psychiatrist.
What Happens There?

During an appointment, you won't be examined on a table like you are at a typical doctor visit. You'll sit in a comfortable chair and just talk, play games, or sometimes draw pictures. There are no needles or shots. If you're having problems with schoolwork, the therapist may ask you to answer some questions or solve some puzzles. This can provide clues to how you think and learn.
You should always feel comfortable during these visits. That means you don't have to do anything you don't want to do or talk about anything you don't want to talk about. On your first visit, your mom or dad might come in with you. The three of you could talk together about your feelings, the problem or situation, and anything else that is bothering you. After you feel comfortable, your mom or dad can wait for you outside.
The first visit is about understanding the problem that you need help with and is a chance for the psychologist, therapist, or psychiatrist to get to know you a little bit. At future visits, the two of you can work on solving the problems. You may have regular appointments every week, every month, or less often.
You might be asked to set goals for yourself or to keep a notebook describing your feelings between visits. Bringing this notebook to your appointments can help you track your progress.

You can choose to tell people that you are going to these appointments, or you can decide not to share this information. Who you tell, or if you tell, is your decision.
Getting Help Is No Big Deal

Reviewed by: W. Douglas Tynan, PhD
Date reviewed: December 2007
http://www.kidshealth.com/
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Jessica

Kids and Holiday Stress

Kids and Holiday Stress ...
The article below is one I found through my LinkedIn profile, and I thought it has some great points which may go a long way in helping you to keep your kids stress free duirng the holidays.  This article was posted on Wellspring™ (http://www.wellspring.com/).  Wellspring™ was created in response to the growing need for effective treatments for children with autism-spectrum disorders, behavior disorders and developmental disabilities.

Helping kids cope during the holidays
Wellspring™

It’s that time again. Halloween decorations have come down, retailers are preparing for Thanksgiving which means only one thing……holiday shopping season is upon us. As behavior professionals, one of the single most questions we get asked is about kids’ behaviors at holiday time. Keeping kids well-behaved during the holiday season is every parents dream. However, it is not a goal that is achieved easily.
Even the best-behaved child can have a meltdown at this time of year. Holidays cultivate many stressors that may cause a child to erupt: Absence of routine, over stimulation, being away from home and one important one that many of us may overlook – parent stress. Kids are very tuned into their parents’ mood and when they sense you are stressed, they can get extremely overwhelmed. They need you to stay grounded and when you aren’t, their behavior may show it. So, how do we stay calm and keep our kids calm when we have 37 gifts to buy at 16 different stores and holiday meals to cook and 12-hour trips to take? Read on for tips that can help every parent help their child cope during the stress of the holiday season using positive behavioral support.

SHOPPING!
Shopping with a child can be a nightmare but it doesn’t have to be.
Our number one recommendation for parents is to shop online or leave the kids at home. Unfortunately, this isn’t always a realistic expectation. If you do have to take your children shopping, make sure they are prepared for the situation and make sure you go with realistic expectations:

Explain to them what you are going to be doing and where you are going. Tell them when you will eat, or when they will be able to play.

Be specific about what behavior is expected. Being a good boy or girl is too vague. For example, “we are going to a place where we will have to walk and stay close to mommy and we will have to use an inside voice”. Always tell them what TO do instead of what NOT to do. Providing them with the tools to behave makes life easier.

The mall is boring, overwhelming and confining and children don’t like to stand in line, be quiet or be still. Allow your child some time to run around between stores.
Provide incentives for your child to receive when the shopping is done, such as a trip to the park or an ice cream. When a desired activity follows an undesired activity, a child’s motivation to behave is increased.

Look for the signs that your child may be unraveling. Validate their feelings and needs and remind them of the expected behavior and reward. For example “I know you are getting mad but if you use a quiet voice and remain standing you can earn your treat”. One warning is appropriate but if your child does not stop what he is doing, you may need to leave whatever you are doing.

Always provide praise for good behaviors. We parents focus too much on scolding or punishing our kids when a bad behavior occurs but we forget to reward the good ones. Catch them being good. If your child is standing patiently in line, even for a few seconds, use it as an opportunity to praise him for the good behavior.

Do not plan on going to the mall at rush hours, or the day before Christmas. Avoid overcrowded places as much as possible.

Feed your kids before going out. A hungry child is a recipe for disaster.

Be sure your kids are not tired. Taking them to the mall after a nap is always easier.

And finally, be prepared for a meltdown. If you have a plan of action if the dreaded does occur, it will help you and your child remain calm during the situation. Next week we’ll cover what to do if a tantrum does occur.


For more good tips from Wellspring™, visit http://www.wellspring.com/ .

Jessica

a different perspective

There is an AA saying/prayer that I think is beneficial to anyone and everyone, regardless of circumstance.  It's a saying I have heard a thousand times before (both from having a family member in AA when I was a child AND through my profession when I worked in substance abuse).  However, today, I thought of it in a manner that I never have before, and my eyes were opened to something I never saw before.  Here is the saying/prayer that I am sure you have most likely heard at one time or another:

God, grant me the
Serenity to accept things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can, and
Wisdom to know the difference.

I never really paid much attention to the word "serenity" in this.  I always heard it/processed sort of like this:

God, grant me the serenity to
ACCEPT the things I CANNOT CHANGE
COURAGE to CHANGE the THINGS I CAN, and
WISDOM to KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.

That beautiful, hopeful, peaceful word never stood out to me until now.  I always focused more on the other points, mainly, wisdom to know the difference between what can be changed and what cannot.

But there it is ... there it has always been.  The potential for SERENITY in these difficult moments in our lives where we have to accept difficult things.  It seems almost odd to pick such a word for this, but what a huge sigh of relief.  And what a great reminder that we can choose how much power and hold we give to these things that can consume us. 

I just wanted to share that,
Jessica

A-10-chun!

A-10-chun!

Below is a little exercise that is helpful in establishing or regaining attention/mental clarity.  I've used this as a 'take home activity' for clients who have difficulty with attention (often paired with decreased impulse control and increased energy levels).  I also used to implement this with my own son when I needed to call him and get him focused.  Actually, this exercise became somewhat of a 'out to eat' tradition when my son was in first grade.  Whenever we would go out to eat, he seemed to need something to calm him down while we were waiting for our meals.

Activity:
1) Present a word equation similar to this:


five balls eight lights


2) Then, have your child put this phrase in order according to numbers first, then items (and in the order they were named):


five eight balls lights

*** BE sure to demonstrate this a few times first.

IMPORTANT TIPS:

• This exercise can be implemented with or without paper (writing it down).  This would depend upon your child's ability/development (i.e., you may find your child would do better writing these down at least initially).  This is meant to be challenging, but not to cause frustration or feelings of "I can't do it".  Either way, you may find it helpful to write the first few exercises down until everyone gets the hang of it.
• Present this as a 'game' for the family (not just the one child) rather than a 'task'.  Take turns going around the table ... make sure Mom, Dad, Grandmamma, Granddaddy (whomever is at the table) have turns, too.

ADDITIONAL OPTIONS: 
(be sure to only move onto these after mastery of the above)

• Add to the equations as they are mastered (i.e. - seven car fourteen wall one teacup)
• Establish a theme for each equation (i.e. - "automotives", "foods", "sports")

This is a great (and very simple) tool that lends itself well to 'on the fly'.  You can implement this in many situations/environments, and it doesn't require props/etc.

Jessica

Your Weekend Recipe

Hello and Happy Friday! What was the recipe for your week? Did it turn out as you planned?

How about this ... what is the recipe for your weekend? Sometimes my weekend consists of way too many ingredients (even though they may be good, sometimes it's overkill).  Sometimes my weekend is Triple Chocolate Pistachio Almond Walnut Coconut Cherry Strawberry Apple Brownie when it would have just been marvelous to "just" have a Chocolate Pistachio Cherry Brownie.  My point? Even with the best of intentions and even with all the best ingrediants, sometimes we pack too much in and the result is that it's just ... well ... too much.  I would like my weekend recipe to certainly include some bit of much needed rest and relaxation, but if I'm not careful, I will tend to cram pack my weekend with "to do's", making no room for rest.  This always results in me going into a new work week feeling worn out.  Not good!

Speaking of recipes and yummy desserts, I wanted to mention a few gluten free related items that I have had and loved.  For all of my gluten intolerant clients and web friends, here are some things I have discovered.

1)  Whole Foods brand (365 brand) of Baking Mix (GF flour mix) is AMAZING! It has made every thing I have attempted taste accurate.  After attempting my mom's cobbler recipe a few different times with various brands and combos of GF flour mix, I used the 365 brand and it actually tasted like my mom's! The taste and the consistency and texture was like Mom's! I have also used this to make my carrot cake and it tastes just like it used to (before I found out I had a gluten allergy).
2)  Whole Foods brand (365 brand) Chocolate Cake Mix is amazing! Be sure to look at the ingredients you need before leaving the store (as they are not your typical cake mix ingredients).  My only recommendation here is to be sure to not overmix.  Betty Crocker now has a GF cake mix (chocolate and vanilla), but I haven't tried it yet.
3)  Betty Crocker Chocolate Chip Cookie Mix (and Brownie Mix) - amazing and accurate!
4)  Don't trust regular corn meal mix.  I use the Hodgson Mill Corn Meal (says Gluten Free), and love it! Once I discovered this, my fried shrimp/fish/chicken tasted "real", and I was finally able to have "real" tasting corn bread!
5)  Annie's brand of boxed Macaroni and Cheese - I actually enjoyed this! I doctored it up a little with cream and butter, but it was great.

I'll add more on another day ;)
Enjoy your weekend,
Jessica

a great social story from a fellow blogging therapist ...

There's a great blog I enjoy entitled "If Only I Had Super Powers".  The blog is hosted by a Speech-Language Pathologist/Mommy, and she has a range of topics from recipes for "Moosey Muffins" (home related topics) to "Articulation Development" (Speech Therapy related topics).  

"Therapy Thursdays" are dedicated to therapy, and it was in her most recent Thursday posting that I discovered this little social story entitled Therapy Thursday: Not Getting Chosen.  Click on the link above to visit the site (and to view a larger version of her social story). 

I love that she has included pictures here beside each line.  This is something I often include in my social story activities.  It serves various purposes, including drawing attention to each line (scenario/action) as well as making each line more applicable to real life situations and more concrete.

Thanks, Super Powers, for a great resource!
Jessica

Whew! Halloween!

Wow - what a day/week/weekend! Talk about chaos! But fun, though.  The week of Halloween was an especially crazy one for me with work and home life.  My CSU clinical students are closing in on the end of their clinical semester, I've got some perspective new clients that I've enjoyed speaking with this week, and I've had various schedule changes this past week as well (two cancellations and some extra sessions also).

On Friday, we parents hosted a soup lunch for the teachers/staff at my son's school.  I am so thankful for my fellow volunteers! I rushed home from this to finish the prep work at home for a Halloween Party we were having at the house for my son and his friends Friday night.  Although my back was killin me and I was so ready for those kids to go on home by the end of it ... (come on, now, my house was full of middle schoolers ... can you blame me?) ... we still had a great time ;) I have great friends who came to 'party' with me as well as to help with the party. 

All in all it was good chaos :) The way I am built, though, I had to be sure to 'schedule in' some downtime for the sake of my sanity and my nerves. 
I hope you all had a nice, safe, and fun weekend,
Jessica